Zee

Drank a lot last night. Spent my last monies. Smoked probably ten cigarettes. Or less. I quit coffee. I drink chai lattes and green tea lattes probably every other day. I eat less now. Lost five pounds. I want to run everyday. I'm trying to drink more juices. Think I'm going to take a nap. And read The Fountainhead. Going to catch up with Jhonen for now. Thinking of writing installments of new book on facebook.

You are SO good (so far)

Tonight is Saturday. Mom/Maria is not here yet. My phone is off. I'm really horny and want to drink. I'm going to dress sexy and keep it in my pants. It's going to be hard. No pun intended. If Bakersfield talks in German I'm going to jump on him. Ok, Health stats: Haven't drank in a week. I may have a couple tonight. And I mean a couple. I'm trying to up wheatgrass shots and veggie juices. Bakersfield got a juicer. I drank two 16oz coffees today, everyday. No smoking except two cigs when I was drunk last week.
I got an old camera from 1973. Yashica, baby. I have to exercise more. Trying to drink more apple cider vinegar. Trying to spoon feed self some molasses because of high iron and potassium content.
I'm going to try to volunteer at SPCA. I'm thinking it will up happiness meter. E.L. is a 5 right now. That's pretty good. I'm into mulit-green kombucha again. Really glad I hooked up with Bakersfield. I need to get a multi-vitamin. (vegan of course) I gotta poop. bye.

Jody Time!!!!

I didn't quit coffee. I did jog today. Felt great. I think there is too much caffeine in my body. Still need to declutter life. I'm going to make a list of stuff to do. Like borrow Precious. And decorate house more Halloween style. Because there are sales of Halloween stuff at the store. Write book. I feel good. Mentally. I was a Dragon!!!
My mom is moving in with me. Whoa. Checking out places downtown for March. Gotta fix bike. Hopefully mom doesn't have any shiz. Bored of this now. Bye.

How Hot is the Oven?

I just drank too much coffee. Well, I'm still drinking it. I'm going to "declutter" my life. (saw this on sign-1-800-DECLUTTER) Throw all papers away. Donate clothes to Fairhaven Thriftstore. Clean out my trunk. I'm going to quit coffee tomorrow and drink tea instead and then no caffeine at least for a couple months or so. When I feel like I can I want to do a Master Cleanse thingie over the/a weekend.
I'm listening to this nice music. Coffee shop-Groove. I think to myself 'where do they live?' People that listen to this music. It sounds like techno. and indie. I'm not being negative, but I feel like they live in a world of rotating pictures, model shots. smiles. It's fake, but who the fuck cares. It just happens to be their reality. I have my own...
today is Halloween. Fucking Halloween. I need to take a walk. (this next song is annoying, maybe I just want silence) Now when I drive I can't even stand NPR. I want to hear nothing. Weird. I guess. I'm hoping it's more mental stability in the right direction. Danny doesn't listen to music very often I think. I'll have to ask. I need my Halloween back. I'll find you. I have to leave this fucking coffee place or I am going to throw this speaker. I don't care about Willie Nelson. Rowr. I am bitchy today. I'm still annoyed I have to scare people for one more night. Damn it. And it's still going to be fun. Bye.

Developed A Taste for Cars?!

I don't mind you comin here...3 days left of Nightmare. I feel good. No drinking, no smoking. Eating moderately healthy. No exercise though. Ate lots of chips.

Steatopygia!

I miss George John a lot. It's only been 3 days. Meh. It's a good missing though. I would like to sleep. And wish very much that people would stop talking to me. Shit. Someone just talked to me. Going to move downtown. Hopefully, this will make my mind feel better to hardly drive at all.
I start yoga and cardio classes November 15th. This should up healthy levels. Really wanted to drink last night. And smoke cigarettes. Even went so far as to pull up to Crazy Fox and then drive away. Bakersfield was out drunk and dancing. Made me very anxious. And that was going to be my tipping point. And I thought about that in that exact moment and felt like that was probably not good. I need to stretch in the morning everyday and cut down on coffee. Up water. When I start making up multiple reasons why I should do something...Very glad I didn't drink. Super tired after 6 hours of sleep. Probably just worn out in general. Read over what I have for "Spirit Knight". It is very loose. My storyline is way off. I may have to edit stuff in first book. Need to tighten up Gem's character.

Convoluted or Interrobang?!

Well, hey there crazy. One minute you're happy and in the next five minutes Pre-cal puts you into a murderous rage. All the sudden you think maybe you shouldn't be a physicist. What?! the ?! fuck?! Now I have to calm down. Go meditate. I don't like the word meditate. I'm coming up with a new one. I really like how Bakersfield corrects himself to use "physics" instead of "lord/god". The new word for meditation is interrobang I've decided. I'm not going to clear my mind, I'm going to go float on a hoverboard (clear). Hoverboard is not in the blogger dictionary. Ha but blogger is. Nice. I got angry because of vector addition. I felt like I was just computing and not understanding the concepts. And I felt like everyone else was either getting it or just faking it (which really pissed me off).
Ok, so vector addition is force with direction and then adding that to another force with direction (magnitude). And it is based on the concepts of trigonometry.
I'm going to pretend to be a journalist so I can interview people I (may) admire. I decided that my anger could be solved with some interrobang, running, yoga, those last two I may not do, and supplementation reading about trig and vectors at Barnes & Noble before Uss Nightmare. I need examples, I need applications. The farther I go in Calculus, the more I realize...(Charles, remember to pick up a grammar book, I'm pretty sure your placement of commas is appalling) ...that most of it is fucking inference. This shit is not fucking easy. Without your teacher constantly reminding you, you would be fucking lost. I mean really. And if you do get this easily you probably have no luck with the ladies/guys. haha. Look at that. My little ego is getting hurt because I don't understand this shit. fuck. swive. Inference. that looks wrong. anyway. Most of the math I'm doing/ will do, I will have to really think about. The answers will not jump out at you. And I just found out my Calc teacher was a Mechanical Engineer. BTW I capitalize whatever I want.
I think I feel better right now. Except. I cannot work two jobs or a lot while going to school. I cannot drink or smoke cigs ever. I need to publish my book but I don't have enough money. Because I want the cover to be the way I want. And the font. I am going to make money off writing books. So that I can write and go to school. This is THE plan. I will not fuck it up.
I gotta go to the costume store to look at animal costumes. My fetish is Fluffies or Furries or whatever they're called. I like fluffies better. I'm going to fluff the shit out of Bakersfield in my honey badger costume. chupacabra. I'm out.

A One Sided Race

I'm standing on the edge of cliff looking down always. The thing that makes me feel better is that there is another me behind me and sometimes when the other looks in too deep, about to fall in, the other me grabs the collar of her shirt and yanks her back. I hope this cookie is vegan.

Amoeba Dance

I wonder what my face looks like to someone else. Not all the time. Just right now. Working back to back. Need sleep. Want to go to a garage sale today. I got the vegan cupcakes. Very good. I feel better that I feel in control. Might lose something down the road but _ _ _, will have its advantages. ICBFY.  Was reading "Time" magazine...pause...I just claimed Bakersfield. Awkward. Well, not really. Sort of. You really can't help it if your significant one gives out free hugs and you want everyone to know, "Hey, buddy. That's as far as you're going to get. Here's your ___. Don't cross it. I have Chuparaptors.  Don't make me use them." ...play...in this magazine that I respect mind you, the phrase in reference to spinach and why it is good for you without an explanation is, "'Nuff said." No, I am not fucking around. I saw it very poorly while my eyes were dilated (sp). 

Cupcakes!!!!

My nose is stuffed. I drank a laxative last night. I think it's about to hit me. I really want a coffee. I am going to get a green tea latte with soy at Kroger's Starbucks before my eye doctor appointment.

I am having someone at work make me vegan Cupcakes!!! Tonight! Whoa! I am excited.

My brain feels good. Woke up late this morning though. Probably because I stayed up too late watching "Haven". (The suspense! I needed to know what happened in this made up world!) I really have to go.

Feeling Better

My throat still hurts. It was worse yesterday, especially last night. I woke up with one nostril stuffed. I took a vitamin c thingie. I think it helped. I am ubiquitous. No.
I never want to smoke again. I have no cravings for them either. I also have not been to the bar in awhile. On purpose. Not really any cravings for alcohol except wine. And even then I feel that a single glass would suffice (RED).
Oh, hey I forgot I was supposed to read science news articles during this break.
I am more sharp.
I gave up coffee. Not caffeine. I won't mind caffeinated teas.
On a side note: It is very nice to wake up next to Bakersfield. It really sets off my day nicely. Especially when I spend the night there and don't meet my quota of enjoyable showers.
I felt like I was obstinate yesterday. I was disagreeing with everything said. And I noticed it as I was doing it. Blah. It's one thing for me to ponder and pose questions, but it is another thing to be an asshole.
I'm sensitive right now. My eyes still hurt.
I have to put the reigns on my excessive eating. It's 11:49am. Hunger just started. That's way too late. Or maybe not. Because now I feel light-headed.
I'm going to drink a lot more juices. None of that bottled crap. Fresh juices. They taste way better. So no morning coffee. I am going to substitute with a green juice or a cocktail of healthy things. I would like to also take a beauty pill. For anti-aging and healthy nails, hair, and skin.
Realize I don't really have time or energy for running right now. Hopefully, yoga though. Class time. I'm hungry. Gonna eat mashed potatoes. Chupacabra.

Omneity

My throat hurts. Haven't smoked any cigarettes or drank. My eyeballs hurt. I want to cuddle and go to sleep. I made a graph that shows how much I think about sex. Not viable at all, but looks passable. Fuck. My eyes hurt. I'm going to punch someone. Not sure why. Maybe I innately think that passes on pain. I might get sick. Throat hurts. Sneezed some. Took two vitamin c thingies. Drank 1 cup of cold care tea and 1 immunity tea. Dexter told me he has so many math classes he thinks he's number five. My face is itchy from USSN make-up. Not cool. I feel fat. Not cool. I'm going to go for a run in the morning. The carrot will be having my ritual coffee. Whoa. I'm totally going to run then. I have to mix paint. 

Jokers

Overeating. No cigs or alcohol since birthday party night. Still drinking too much caffeine. Feeling real existential. Just ate a 500 calorie cookie. Yum.

Project Rainbow MacBeth

I'm making a moat around my apartment building to keep out riff-raff. If anyone has any alligators laying around to donate to this cause, that would be awesome. If they're vegetarian that would be even better.

P.S. Vegetarian because I just want to scare people not kill them.

No Monies!!!

I have not smoked or drank and I don't know how long but, I feel good today. I'm really broke. I am more prone to sadness when I am more healthy.

Very Conflicted About Today

I was told there is enough food being produced to feed everyone. Theoretically, famine should not exist. The U.S. Gov't has to store food because there is too much. There are reasons we do things the way we do them. I guess the biggest problem in the world is that people don't have enough information. And they don't care. I'm not sure how this feels. I interpret this as "We're [humans] are just a big bunch of stupid assholes."
I cannot fail Pre-cal 2, Charles. You did not turn in your lab report. Your priorities are off. I know you want more time but, I can't give it to you right now. You think there's this veil? Well, all the information is here. You just need to learn it. You're an asshole.

I'm very hungry right now. Thank goodness I only have one class left. I think I'm going to read something about neutrinos being faster than light. I need a nap, too.

p.s. I added the guitar last just because I wanted a picture.

Calculator Batteries

Hmmm...[I just deliberated over how many "m's" to use for that. (Did I even write "m's" correctly? I'm just going to stop.)]

I'm feeling sensitive in spurts now. Breathe in. The air smells so nice when you don't smoke. I was going to go to the bar but, I think that would be too much for me right now.  I can't wait to run regularly. Lily said she wants to run with me. I like that.

A yoga class and a cardio class next quarter. I'm going to up my game at work. I want to cook more. It would be nice to cook more vegan dishes better since most of the time I just eat whatever. I need glasses. No one should read my blog because it's just me talking to myself. shit.

Xor

If I did have a laser gun, it probably wouldn't make that sound. I'd have to add it.

Whoa! You said you have movie flashes, too!

When I am in Pre-cal 2 class, my mind is blown all the time. You might think my teacher would think I was weird, but I think he enjoys how much I like it even though I never do my homework or study. Swive it.
So, 3 and a half days no-smoking. I feel sharper. Wow. Healthy mind, healthy body correlation. Charles, you're stupid.
I am my own experiment. Hmm. No smoking. No alcohol. No chips. No fried food. Cardiovascular exercise that gets my heart rate up at least 4 times a week. I don't do this for nothing, you know. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Watch out! Here comes a train! Fuck. Just like that Stephen King book. I can't say the same for other people.
I hate when I write "q's" because I was always fuck up and write them as "g's" first.
I read somewhere being raw vegan lets you sleep less and function the same. It's sorta true from my experience. Except I crave potatoes like a motherswiver.
I have to stay super healthy. I enjoy math class so much when I can pay attention. I enjoy it hungover, too, but I need to understand this shit. All the way.
I have Digital Combinational Logic class now. I need to go for a run.
T. Games is my new health enemy. He doesn't know it though. And he's vegetarian. Which I think is ok. Vegan is not the healthiest form of diet if you just happen to be "vegan". I would have Bakersfield as my health enemy but with his Dilineatarianism [sp? (this is double funny, but none of you know about that)] I'm not sure how to gauge the invisible battle in my head. Not sure about chess either. Which we haven't even discussed. If B.O. can beat me after I've practiced then I'm fucked (swived). Holy physics. He probably will. Oh, man. New plan must be made. Stay tuned Earthlings...

Wheely Bugs For Grown-ups

I am the Burrito King!

Bakersfield is a nice place this time of year.

I'm always weirded out by how much bad grammar infuriates me. I'm done drinking because mostly it ruins my grammar skills.

DBT

Designated Baby Thrower. Ha. Just kidding. But no really. DGK is DBH. Designated Baby Holder. I dub thee.
Really not happy. Track this process, Charles. Very unhealthy. I don't care about feigning happiness. I'd rather create and be complacent. Everything is slipping. Gonna fall off the Earth for a week. "Fall off the Earth"? Weird euphemism.

Gravel Dancing Cont'd

Holy Physics! I got to do it in some random building (with a really hot man). I am so fucking elated by this.
Haven't smoked for 2 and a half days. My brain is psycho right. Seriously. Drank lots last night. Beer. Rum&cokes. That licorice-german shot. Don't remember the swiving. Really bummed by this. It was probably epic. Wow. Letting life fall by the wayside. Not happy about this. I need a huge detox and a vacation. Not to be corny and lame but I am super stoked about__. Shh. It's a secret. Not. He's fucking awesome.

Some Kind Of Start

I've decided to track my progress in becoming more healthy. I'm vegan. I don't cheat. I drink alcohol ( a lot of it) about 3-4 times a week. I smoke about a pack of cigarettes when I drink. I exercise probably about twice every two weeks. Either a run or some weighted exercises. Today my name is Rupert/Brittany. My thoughts feel scattered and I do not feel quick-witted. I have to go.